The Unspoken Words About Sharing Your Problems With Someone.

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Hushhhh! They can’t be trusted?
                                              

 Where can we go to find God if we cannot see Him in our own heart and in every living being-  Swami Vivekananda

When our heart wears on the character of a mortar and pestle and an invisible hand begins the pounding job; when we quiver saying the word “I am fine”, of course, there is a problem.

The cold feet, the troubled mind, the emotional instability are all signs that the heart carries the burden of problems that the solution seems far-fetched. 

At this time, various options seem explorable ̶  many, not. One of the many explorable options could be ‘talking to someone’, but it doesn’t take many hours of thought before the majority of the concerned individuals discard the idea.
Someone said: “Why on earth will they discard such an idea?”

Let’s not say “wire” or “because Y has a long tail and two branches”. Naturally, I would have said that, but for ‘blog-ical reasons’, we should get serious.

Reasons are attached to everything. Every wisest and dumbest action are products of a cause. For no sign of willingness to discuss problems with others, there are, of course, reasons:
  • REASON 1- Because God is our best friend: “Ask and it shall be given”. Anybody conversant with the holy book will tell you that. I am assuming that many believe because of that, man doesn’t need to talk to man, God’s above all.
  • REASON 2- We can’t discuss our problem because men will expose us: Men are said to be blackmailers. Before you know they’d expose your problem and maybe use you as an example in a speaking engagement.
  • REASON 3- We just don’t know how to say it: “Will I now say that this and this happened to me? What will he think of me afterwards?” I hear that always.

QUESTION OF THE POST: Dr Smart, are you trying to shake tables? And can you justify those reasons for the people concerned?

No, I am not trying to shake tables? What for? I am actually trying to break and shatter them. 

And, I can’t justify it. Justification demands that I prove they are right.  If I copy and paste the reasons on Microsoft word and press ctrl J, it will only align the selected texts and not justify the validity of those reasons. So who am I to stress myself? Not even when I am certainly sure they are wrong. 

Knowing I just can’t say they are wrong, I have my comments on each reason:

Comment on Reason 1: In King James account of Genesis 2, Mighty God knowing that it is not good for a man to be alone created a “helpmeet”  for Adam. Who is a helpmeet? Dictionary says “a helpful companion, especially husband or wife”. 
Notice husband and wife appeared? Don’t forget the ‘especially’. Adam can access God, yet God thought it right that Adam should have a helper.

 This can only mean one thing, that the idea or 2 to billions of people on earth today, is for us to be helpers to each other. So tell it to God! but it is also right to tell it to good men that will also beg God on your behalf or give you the solution that God has already given them.  
 
Comment on Reason 2: I was at a teaching hospital at a time, over a skin reaction and the doctor together with his intern were snapping my body. The doctor didn’t ask for my permission, so I asked him why he was doing so. He simply replied that plan to use it to train other people.

 The doctor noted that my face wasn’t captured. 

The crux of my point is that while your problem is shared among people without your names mentioned, you don’t need to give a damn about it. Many that have committed suicide only die because they are unaware that some people live with worse situations.

So when your problem is used as examples you don’t have to be annoyed, count it all joy, because you’ve lifted someone’s spirit. If you don’t want your name or personality tarnished, which is okay, not talking to someone is not the solution, and don’t look for people that will hear your problem and will help ensure it remains between the two of you. 

Rather, look for someone that will let you understand that being joyful is a war for most of us and if he will share your story it won’t be to spite you but to uplift others, even as he helps to find solutions to your problems.

Comment on Reason 3: Only an immature person doesn’t understand that divulging one’s problem and top secrets are means of saying “I’m trying to get off this”. So when you are talking to someone and you are sure it’s a matured mind, then you’ve no cause to think about what he thinks of you. It will always be right.

There is always someone to talk to. They’ll help you through it while you wait on God. If you think you haven’t picked the right friends you can share it with, make friends with those that are worthy.

In my case, I have friends who are special advisers on different courses. I don’t discuss my relationship with the one that I should be discussing business with. If I need to talk to someone concerning certain areas and I don’t see anyone capable around me, I make friends with qualified ones. Altogether, I am saying I rub mind with God and with men.

The top-secret syndrome is what I refer to as our attitude of always keeping things to ourselves, as if said, things will go haywire. It shouldn’t rule you. Please talk to someone worthy. It helps.

TESTIMONIAL

A WhatsApp message I received from a lovely soul.
After seeing this, I am sure that when the person is morally upright,
living an exemplary life and loves God… talk to them. It might just be all you need (An answer from God).


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Hi,

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Committed to your personal growth,
SMART OLAWALE.

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